I am the Eater of Old Food (except fish)
The Shopper of Grocery Sales
The Decider of Voting
I am the Insect Remover (except bees)
I am the Chooser of Music and Video
I am the Driver of Vehicles, both night and day
I am the Master of Arithmetic
Controller of the Remote
He Who Goes Into Dark Places First
I am the Pillager of Time
The Slipper-Inner of One More Thing
He Who Moans For No Reason
Obey Me